Things that matter...

1.family

and I guess two is religion.
I have a hard time with that, honestly i'm not that religious. I am just not. It hard to be when things happen that you have no control over. The phrase my mom always says is "God never puts anything on your plate that you can't handle"

...

...

...

Trust me a little less, please?

Its just like he thinks I can deal with losing, losing, and not really getting anything out of busting my hump. Is like I'm taking three steps back and one forward, when people who are cruel and mean and just flipping suck, take bounds forward and don't help anyone but themselves. I just don't get it. Sure, the bible says nothing is fair in life, i'm not looking for fair, i'm looking for some sort of relief.

Its just a pain in the arse, and hard to think positivity about.
I guess that's why they call it Faith, yeah?

Anyway, three?
Friends? I put a question mark there because honestly, its hard to trust people,
its hard to get them to do the right thing, to help them when they think your not. Its hard, and when they finally realize it, it's too late. For various reasons (moved away, or just moved apart). Its just, frazzling, and hard to grasp.

I had an amazing group of friends, then it went down hill. Then it went up hill, and then down hill again, and gradually like a roller coaster its going up and up. But you know what I wish? I wish to just find all a new. To let go of the past, present, and search for a better future, because I'm tied of holding onto what's just here in front of me, whats there at my side, whats in the past is no more its stuck in the past for a reason. I wish that being forgotten didn't hurt as much as It does. That someone being there could be there without me having to ask. Isn't that what a friend is? Is that to much to ask? To think believe in a person to do something that simple? I guess so...

Its just hard to believe I guess. To have the wonder of a child any longer, to deal with the life as an adult. Speaking of which, I'm getting glasses.

I have 20/40 vision with a slight stigmatizm. Joy, right?
It explains why I can't read the projectors in class.

Again, trust me a little less big guy.

I just, ugh. I've had a crazy week. Went on vacation, and it was defiantly a learning experience, and a long one at that.

party?

I prefer to stay home and watch a movie, or play a dance game.

Its lame, sure, but at least I don't get into trouble, and I enjoy myself.

I just ektjslkjdfgkljgkjlesjrisds right now. I feel like i'm spinning my wheels and getting no where. Its sad, but true, and it just might be the time in my existence I guess.

But whatever.

I'll get through one way or another, I just wish it was a little less, jumbled or what not. I wish people would stop sucking so much, and actually realize that if you live by what you learn in kindergarten, it might be better;;
1.its okay to cry,
2.play fair,
3. always try your best.

Thats all you need. for real.

and to dream big I guess, to actually survive, you need that!

I'm rambling on and on, and not jack is going to change by my simple rambles. but hey, it makes me feel better, right?

Thats always important, so do that